I can’t stand me


I can’t me…..

when my ego runs wild, doing it’s best to convince me of all the ways I am broken, lost, damage, no good, not worthy.  Feeding my fears, insecurity by insecurity.  Unrelentless judgment (of everyone and everything) Ridicule.  Shame and guilt.  She’s can be cruel and heartless.  The constant reminders of all the reasons why I must do and be and on and on she goes…

That’s when I can’t stand me.

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Self forgiveness

Day 6
Self Forgiveness
I use to hate myself
Every little mistake became another brick in my wall
Another dirty secret
Another bone to the closet
Another reason why I was unworthy of love
I held onto everything
Every little wrong to someone else
Something I said or didn’t say
Something I did or didn’t do
Day after day
Entering the ring
Only to be knocked out
I wore my guilt like a warm furry winter coat
Until one day
The burden became too great
I couldn’t walk
Or look people in the eyes
I cowered
I lowered my head
I was the door mat
An unlovable lump
Until I could carry my burden no more
I screamed
I cried
I sought help
I released
I forgive myself
And learned how to love myself